Dear Nigeria, Why Are You Killing Us?

I had hope. I’m sorry but I did. For a moment, I was hopeful that the country was going to turn around. If you listen closely, you’d hear the excitement in my writing tone in my previous #EndSARS article. Nigeria has failed me and the tiny string of hope I had left in me has been shattered.

Nigeria killed that hope and there’s more to it.

Today, I don’t want to talk extensively about what’s been happening or the massacre that happened in the country between yesterday and today. I don’t have the energy to. I feel numb. Heartbroken. Pained. Angry.

It’s such a mess that the government you expect to protect you turns around to shoot you in the face. Then, they lie. Boldly. Without blinking. They are certain there’s nothing we can do about it. They have the power and will use it. To kill us, maybe?

WHY ARE YOU SHOOTING AT US?

It doesn’t matter if you’re sitting on the floor, with the Nigerian flag raised as you wave it in rhythm with the anthem. It doesn’t matter if you mutter “peace and unity” or shout it out with every breath you have. It doesn’t matter if you were in your house or street or took the bus. It doesn’t matter if you ran or swam in the ocean or just lay flat on the floor.

They shoot. They just shoot. They don’t care.

Who sent them? Why is the military attacking peaceful protesters? Is this a country? Do we ever have a voice? Can’t we desire something better?

I have questions. A lot of them. But will it stop them from shooting me?

Does anything matter? Does my life matter to these people? Or I’m just a random person they can point a gun at, shoot while I run unarmed, and then, they throw a high-five to their fellow colleagues?

What is the worth of a Nigerian life?

And even when I’m on the verge of death, will they let the ambulances get to me on time? Why do you wish so much to see me die, Nigeria?

How long will this continue? Will we ever have a break? Do you want us to be quiet and remain slaves in our country?

Our white is stained but was there ever a time it was white?

The system is rotten. This governance is a mess.

Nigeria will kill you with no apologies. If they don’t take your life, they will kill your hopes and dreams until you’re left with nothing but a broken heart. Unrepairable.

There was a country and it never had a president.

Dear Nigeria,
You have broken us and taken a piece with you. You have killed us in many ways than you already know.

Hopefully, this is the last time you kill me because what is dead may never die.

There lies the last string of hope I ever had in Nigeria. I give up.